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I have never heard anyone describe exactly how I feel so concisely. That eternal internal push and pull!!

This is the video that finally made everything kinda fall into place. Its been a few years now since ive started seeing things and looking into what my problems may actually be. I started mostly by looking into ADHD since i felt like i related to that the most (especially the forgetfulness and being easily distracted) but i eventually took online assessments that said i have a strong possibility of having autism. So i started to look into that as well. I noticed that as much as i related to either, something was missing. I didnt fully fit in with either one individually (and becuase i have an aversion to making and maintaining appointments and just doctors/hospitals in general, in part due to money...) i never actually managed to get the proper assessments that ive been wanting. But this is the first video ive seen that fully addresses both at the same time and it finally all falls into place. I definitely still want to go get proper assessments and diagnosis but since its already been multiple years since i first suspected and wanted to do so, it may be a while until i can get myself to do so lol...

I will not persuade diagnosis. First I don't have time for it. Second, no one here has the patience to check it. 3rd, there is no use to get diagnosed. None will understand any of my issues will not go outside the window. I have to live with it. So I will just find ways to make something easy for myself. It's scary to find out the result. I have gone through one therapy for my issues. Nothing came to it. I don't wanna go for second time to seek answers. I haven't noticed it. But as my life gets different i started to notice something was different. I thought i had mental health issues. I just don't know. I will just leave it as it is.

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As a 31 with not enough energy atm...i would LOVE for you to do Buffy. I would watch it as soon as it pops up on my algorithm

Very interesting. I was diagnosed with add when I was 4. I feel like I do all of these things you talked about except the keeping a clean house. That is so hard for me, no matter how much the clutter bothers me. Hopefully that means this isn't me. My husband is self diagnosed asd, my son has been diagnosed with asd, and my daughter is currently on the wait list for diagnosed

I’m hyperlexic I don’t like reading. I do like looking at letters though.

It is so good to see videos like these that help explain the contradictions so many of us live with and how hard it is to be both believed and get proper treatment. My therapist did the ADHD intake test and said that although there were indications there wasn't enough for a diagnosis, which I was not surprised. I haven't even spoken about the autism issue. I'm 69 years old and I have been living with this I now realize since I was very young. I can see it all the way back to the age of five. I'm getting ready to discuss it with my therapist and videos like this are really helping. Watching you both discuss it and the things you said about it are me to a T. It's scary. It's easy to take symptomology and assign causes to that symptomology. I have Ehlers-Danlos and I was misdiagnosed until I was 54 years old and was finally diagnosed by a geneticist. So I understand how symptoms don't necessarily indicate an actual verifiable disease or disorder. what I've learned is that sometimes you just have to live with who you are regardless of the probable diagnosis behind it.

I use the ring, and I will never go back! its much more comfortable than tampons, less gross feeling than pads, and slimmer than a cup. However, it is not reusable.

This is so me!!! 😩 I’ve always felt this way but didn’t know how to explain it. ❤

Me af fr

I used to twist the hair of my dolls around my finger and then chew on it because of the crunchy sound and texture. And sometimes I'd pull them out. My parents thought I swallowed the hair, so they cut them off all my dolls. They looked so ugly and creepy then lol. Anyway, since this stimming source was taken from me, I started the twisting and chewing - in secret - with my own hair minus the pulling out.

adhd doesnt exist....you got played. now doctors own you. ide be happy to explain more in detail, but something tells me you dont like truth

Question: I'm connecting withso much on here yet never suspected I might be autistic so I'm wondering, since autistic people process more does anyone else get super frustrated for nuerotypicals who don't process enough from what you can observe?

whenever I force myself to interact with people I start to gaslight myself that I AM able to hold a conversation.

ADHD and autism can greatly be improved by proper diet. Read: "Breaking the vicious cycle" by Elaine Gottschall.

I've done a lot of therapy and minored in psychology in undergrad with intent of potentially becoming a therapist. Honestly this led me to question therapy in general. There are many things that I'm skeptical of. For example it seems a therapist can major in something non-related in undergrad and then earn a two-year Master's and immediately become a therapist, so it seems like some therapists only have two years of training. Maybe I'm wrong about that but if I'm right I don't think that makes sense. There are other issues as well that I don't have time to put in a yt comment but would love to hear other people's perspectives on this. It just seems like we go to therapists trusting them to know what they're doing and to know how to adapt their approach for different clients, and it seems like too many of them don't fit that description in general, and then adding onto that the challenge with being autistic in therapy and it's just really hard.

This is a thing for me, in part. It could take a while for me to warm up to an NT girl. My feelings are usually of friendship, brotherly love, or some lukewarm variation of romantic. I could be smitten by someone with ASD pretty quickly. I think infodumps help alleviate my anxieties around ambiguity, coupled with a feeling of relief that I'm interacting with a fellow alien, it feels great. I'm pretty sure I haven't been intensely attracted to anyone who wasn't on the spectrum.

All of this!!! My partner has both. I think I have both and looking back on my childhood, I think my dad had both.

I was just looking for a diagnosis because I had developmental delays and problems when I was a child. I only learned that I was diagnosed with ASD and schizo-affective disorder in my adult years, after the definition of autism had been expanded by the DSM-5.

I was misdiagnosed , misunderstood and unnecessarily medicated for 37 years (43 now). Add childhood trauma from abuse and a family that just bullied and gaslit me for my entire life, now because of constant masking and the cognitive dissonance caused by all of this my brain has atrophied and I now live in a constant state of anhedonia. It’s like a permanent state of shutdown. Honestly, I don’t want to live like this anymore. I have to fake any interest in anything and my life is go to work, come home, go to sleep and then I go wild camping to get away from this god awful society. No family and one friend in the world. Society fucked me and spat me out. I’m kinda done tbh.

Everything in shade of Grey. I relate thought they tend to say that autistic person tend to see thinks black or white. I have been in a catholic school I drove them crazy with question and arguments even as a kid. The fact that people around me pretends believing was disturbing. I felt like Iwas the only sane person in the world.

Not me watching this at midnight AS IM SEWING A DRESS I JUST IMAGINED!!!

Am i the only one that kept getting distracted by the reflection of the ring light in her glasses? I had to go back and listen without watching lol

Ear plugs, are, your friends

I don’t think you're representing CBT in a fair way. I don’t understand how autistic people feel, and maybe it doesn’t work for them. If I have a thought that causes me stress, I ask myself whether it reflects reality, and usually, I find some distortions. When I correct them, I instantly relax. I used to stress about my relationships, but now I just ask myself, 'Do I care about what this person thinks?' The answer is usually 'no,' and this removes all my stress, allowing me to live my life the way I like. Our thoughts do often affect our feelings

I was traumatized in childhood, so I tried therapy a few times. Each time, I wondered how I was being helped because I couldn't see it as any better than talking to a close friend. Then I discovered "Feeling Great " by David Burns, a kind of self-help book based on CBT. I love it. Therapy might be beneficial for others, but I've encountered some incompetent or even harmful therapists, so I won't try it again. I also get suspicious when people go to therapy all the time… Are they being helped really?

Im in my sixties and finding out a lot about autism/ADHD. I believe now that my mother was autistic- I recognise her behaviour in so many of these videos online- but im now thinking I might be autistic too- I know it runs in families. Think my two younger sons are too. The middle son was diagnosed with dyslexia at Uni, and has all the traits of ADHD too. Youngest son has always been my 'Little Weirdling' although he manages to mask most of the time. I'm an only child, so spent a lot of time on my own when I was small. My 'tiny' space was the triangular gap made by opening a door against a piano in our living room.I used to take a cushion and a rug and hide there for hours. Dont know if my mother even noticed. And yes, I had fantasy worlds in my head, and watched the characters I'd made, having adventures. (We didnt have a TV when I was young, so I listened to the radio a lot, and could 'see' the stories. I remember hiding under a table when listening to an adaptation of Alan Garner's 'Weirdstone of Brisingamen' because it terrified me. I also used to think that I was a fairy, and that the stork had delivered me to the wrong house, because I didnt feel that I fitted in with my parents. My OCD traits were/are pulling out my eyelashes, and constantly running my hands through my hair, and rolling the loose hairs that come out into a ball. I do this especially on car journeys. I also cant stand still when im standing at the bus stop- I pretend im 'exercising' but really I' m rocking and standing up on my toes because I'm anxious that the bus wont turn up again! At my age I can get away with it, as people just see me as a crazy old woman. 😜 I have food issues, but had never really thought about them. Sauces turn my stomach! Tomato Ketchup, Brown Sauce, Chutneys, yuk yuk yuk. But Im ok with mayo and tartare sauce. Milk puddings that my mother made also used to make me feel sick, because of the slimy texture- rice pudding, tapioca, semolina. 🤮 I didnt have to fake sickness to get out of going to school, because when I was little I was constantly sick with all the childhood diseases, and my mother wouldnt let me go to school! I agree about the 'Milk of Magnesia' being foul though- The doctor once prescribed a 'chocolate flavoured' version for me which was foul. I managed to hide it behind the leg of a piece of furniture when my mother was out of the room, and she never found it. And Mum used to tell me off for 'rocking'- another thing my eldest son pointed out that I still do. And i swing my legs under the table a lot too. Im learning a lot about autism online. Doesnt really matter at my age that Im undiagnosed, but its helping me realise that maybe theres a reason why I've always been seen as a bit 'weird'.

I still like the way you presented this topic best. Well spoken!

What a beautiful and important conversation! I didn’t think I needed the book, now I want to study it thoroughly and take notes. Thank you so much for sharing this, it was a pleasure to pick your wonderful brains 🧠 ❤️

I was diagnosed with autism with a provisional adhd diagnosis tacked on. I am becoming more convinced that the psychiatrist got it right. Thank you for this

I felt so broken until my audhd friens said "youre just like me" Now it's waiting months for the doctors to finally test me for the damn things, but I finally feel like I'm going to be heard

I don’t relate to most people with autism, because I’ve never struggled making friends or fitting in, I always asked for help when I was at school and I was always really confident and sociable and never cared what people thought about me or said to me and I’ve never masked in my life. That’s why it took me so long to get diagnosed with it. No one thought I had it, including my family, I got told you can’t have autism if you’re confident. People did think I was weird when I was at school, but I didn’t care.

Yes. I have had therapy 3 times around 4 yeArs each. Only the last time help at all. Going over sht hurts us more then normal. People. Bullying trauma PTSD over and over is bad.

i'm diagnosed with adhd & i'm female my brother is diagnosed with autism people ask me if i'm autistic 24/7 i don't feel like going to get a diagnosis but i'm still wondering

I used to eat chalk idk if that’s somethjng

My psych suggested I have ocd and I don’t really think so but this is exactly what I discribed to her with wanting structure but then never maintaining it and inner conflict and she was confused about it and I don’t know how to go about it, I’ve only gotten the adhd diagnosis and the clashes balancing each other out are kind of falling out of balance

Yes Sam! Love your honesty and thanks for sharing. I'm glad that the combo efforts have been so good for your recovery. Resonating hard with your journey

Inner conflict all the time. Outer conflict even more.

Really hoping you'll do that part 2 of your psychedelic experience... The details!

The circles in your glasses keep distracting me. I think I'm positive for something 😆

You've done amazingly well given all the things you have been through over the last two years or so. Thank you for being real, vulnerable and showing us ways forward

I think, I need to set a meeting with a doctor

5:19 OBAFGKM

I have level 1 autism, and absolutely cringe at the high/low functioning labels. Because what does that actually mean???? There are days where I am killing it, on task, and nobody can function on the level I do. Then there are days where I feel so burnt out I have to check into a hospital and go on disability for 1-8 weeks. I have a genius IQ, and sometimes it’s beyond debilitating that leads to suicide ideation. It’s exhausting never being able to shut off my brain. I hate it.

I have just discovered this talk 4 years after you recorded it. I see your "top-down" reasoning as "a priori", beginning with something assumed to be the truth, and "bottom-up" as "a posteriori", going from elements of evidence to form a certitude or to refrain from certitude whilst needing more evidence (scepticism in the old Greek and Roman meaning). You will find these notions in Plato and Aristotle. I also recommend you read something about the German Romantic philosopher Friedrich von Hardenberg (Novalis). Keep being yourself, a good and open person, and you will go far.

The fact that ADHD and autism are antithetical is extremely stressful. Being pulled in opposite directions simultaneously is maddening. I routinely experience autistic burnout as well as ADHD bore-out (I love that term) at the same time. Ever since I was a kid (60 years ago) I would go nuts wanting stuff to do, but at the same time fighting change with all my might. It's a classic damned-if-you-do/damned-if-you-don't scenario. Stress and cortisol are my continual companions.

omg thank you so much for your video! such an insight for me!!

To minute 8..: you are looking gorgious, and should not have any reason to doubt!

Couldn't resonate more ❤